9-11

Before I go into my selfish thoughts I must say that this is such a sad day. Say lots of prayers for the families. My heart goes out to them.

It is my birthday. It is always too sad to celebrate it today. So we will try to go out this weekend I suppose.

I used to look for some wonderful thing to happen on my birthday. An oddly placed flower in full bloom, or a rainbow in a sunny sky . . . Always something would happen that seemed to be from heaven. I always thanked God for the special thought that he had sent my way.

After the trade centers went down I stopped looking. I stopped celebrating, I stopped feeling very special at all. I know I still am special to my heavenly Father, but I just don't feel it on my birthday any more. I know He says we are fearfully and wonderfully made, and he loves us far more than we could think or imagine. But, knowing and feeling are not the same. So today I must trust Him and believe Him, even though I can't feel Him.

He knew that though, and yesterday something wonderful and special happened out of the blue -- and I did thank God for the special thought for my birthday!